Ever notice when you're in a dark mood, it starts to feel comfortable there?  Everyone has a comfort zone, even if it's a bad zone.  It's way easier to stay in that hole than to try to dig your way out of it.  Sometimes it's so comfortable, you can start digging even deeper.  You might think, well it's safe here because this is what I know.  If I come out, I may get hurt.  This can last for years for some people because after awhile, the attitude becomes ingrained, a part of the personality.  

You've heard the expression, "Misery loves company."  Misery also loves to stay in a state of irritation, frustration, anger or depression.  It's like a not so good old friend sometimes.  It's what you know, so you stay attached to the feeling.  It is amazing that you can do something like this over and over even though it makes you unhappy.  

If you find yourself in that rut and unable to move forward, what can you?  How do you keep from standing still when you feel zapped of energy?  One thing I have found that is helpful for moving on is to put away things that remind me of whatever is troubling me.  If a relationship is over, stop mooning over e-mails, pictures and gifts you received.  This will only make the depression worse and dig the rut deeper.  There is a period of time after something is over where you might have a tendency to dwell on memories that unfortunately only increase the feeling of loss.

There are always going to be times when you feel like you could have done things differently.  Dwelling on the what if drags you down and keeps you in that rut.  We all have that "could have been" feeling.  As tempting as it may seem to think about, you have to remind yourself that you are trying to move on.  Do not let your mind wander down memory lane too far.  This is a drain on your energy and gets you no where.  

The alternative is to think about the future.  Picture in your mind instead what you want to happen in  your life.  This will plant the seed in your subconscious.  Seek out situations, other people, even music and books that will help the seed grow.  Have you ever heard of a vision board?  I'll be exploring that at a later time.  It is an awesome tool to keep your focus and get out of that rut.